Grumbles & Gratitude

I haven't written for sometime and there are always mixed reasons when I don't write. Usually, it is because I am trying to spend all of my healthy moments with my family and then when I don't feel good, I just don't feel like writing.

The past couple of weeks I have been struggling to look at the sunshine through the rain. My health has been doing so so so much better. However, what seems to be happening when I feel better is that I expect myself to do more, meanwhile forgetting that I am not 100%. Then I get super frustrated when I realize I am not 100% and that pacing myself and patience are still vital to full recovery. Stay with me while I go on a grumbling rant for a moment…
I am tired of needing help. I am tired of not being able to clean my own house. I am tired of depending on others to help me. I am tired of doctors appointments and drinking nasty things to help heal my body. I am tired of having to say "no" to 4 possible job positions in the past several months, because I am not at a place in life where I can work yet. I am tired of being negative and snippy and losing my temper because I can't seem to express to people what is going on with my emotions. Sometimes appearing well is almost worse than appearing sick, because it is almost impossible for people to understand or know that I am not 100%. And quite frankly, I don't want for anyone to know I am not well yet.

I really believe it can be helpful to express grumbles, but to stay focused on them is not in any way shape or form beneficial. So let me share with you just a few things that I am so thankful for…
I am thankful I serve a living God! I am thankful for salvation and the hope of eternal life with a God who loves us even in our darkest hours! I am thankful for the peace that comes from the Holy Spirit! I am thankful for strength from the word of God! I am thankful for an amazing husband who is so patient and loving regardless of his own stresses in life! I am thankful for 3 healthy and happy kiddos! I am thankful for family and friends who are willing to give up their own time and schedules to help out my family! I am thankful good doctors who have not given up on my recovery! I am thankful for a home and food to eat! I am thankful that my heater and air conditioner work! I am thankful I have been able to go on dates, attend church, and even the Irish Dancers Xmas Concert without getting super sick!!

These blessings far outweigh anything that I could ever begin to grumble about, and I didn't even begin to write the half of them. Yes, life is full of disappointment and hardships and sickness. We live in a broken world. But friends, JOY comes in the morning. Thanks be to God.

Psalm 138

Thanksgiving and Praise

Of David AND now of Kelly Myers And hopefully You too!

1 I give you thanks, O Lord, with my whole heart;
    before the gods I sing your praise;
2 I bow down toward your holy temple
    and give thanks to your name for your steadfast love and your faithfulness;
    for you have exalted your name and your word
    above everything.[a]
3 On the day I called, you answered me,
    you increased my strength of soul.[b]

4 All the kings of the earth shall praise you, O Lord,
    for they have heard the words of your mouth.
5 They shall sing of the ways of the Lord,
    for great is the glory of the Lord.
6 For though the Lord is high, he regards the lowly;
    but the haughty he perceives from far away.

7 Though I walk in the midst of trouble,
    you preserve me against the wrath of my enemies;
you stretch out your hand,
    and your right hand delivers me.
8 The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me;    your steadfast love, O Lord, endures forever.
    Do not forsake the work of your hands.